In the early 80's, I had dog chili in a town south of Jefferson - Brownsville, Texas. I did not know what it was till afterwords. It tasted like chili. It was good. I would not have tried it if I had known beforehand. This is what food is all about, though. When you find good food you roll with it, kind of like when that girl you just met grabs your head and shoves your face into her boobs.
In Mexico City, you can order cabeza de cabrito, which is goat's head. It is served on a plate, with the head split open, allowing you to eat the brains directly out of the skull. The tongue is hanging out of the mouth, and you can ask the waiter to thinly slice it for you. I passed on that one.
Salade verte au tripe. The green salad was fine, but I had a hard time with the tripe even though it was cooked with butter and lots of garlic. I did manage to eat most of it. I was smart enough never to order it again. I'm going to brush my teeth again just to get the memory of tripe out of my mouth.
Tripe is stomach from cows (in my case) or from other livestock like pigs, sheep, goats, etc.
I remember as a kid going into Bordenaro's and finding really strange canned goods on their shelves. I once located a can of tiger meat and showed it to Tom Bordenaro. He looked at it, then peeled off the label. Stamped directly on the can it said, "Genuine Rattlesnake Meat".
Back in the 70's, Bordenaro's also carried chocolate-covered ants. We used to take them to the Cooper school and eat them during class. They were mostly chocolate, so you barely noticed the ants. Then one day some kid brought chocolate-coated grasshoppers to school. The bug was a lot more noticeable in those.
Anybody else out there ever try haggis? This is a traditional meal in Scotland and consists basically of a sheep's stomach stuffed with oatmeal. Absolutely the worst-tasting thing I ever ate (or tried to).
Without question the worst Thanksgiving meal I was ever served was at an ex-girlfriend's parents house, where we feasted on a real treat called tofurkey. The manufacturer had attempted to season it, I guess, but to me it tasted the way I would imagine more suited to the box it came in.
That's nothing ... I just found where in L.A. it is legal for a man to beat his wife with a leather strap, as long as it is 2" wide or less. To use a wider one, he is required to get her permission.
I remember a time many years ago when Diamond Dave and myself mixed up a concoction of cod liver oil, pickle juice, and sour milk and talked a neighbor girl into drinking it. We really enjoyed her reaction.
You can buy a bowl of birds nest soup in China for $50-$100 a bowl. These are not made out of twigs and stuff, either. Swifts' nests are made basically out of bird spit, so it is quite the delicacy.
In my estimation, nothing beats a well prepared bird spit casserole. If you are curious as where to order this exotic dish, go to any restaurant and piss off the waiter or the cook.
Some tabasco was in it also. I thought the milk was good, but mixed with the cod liver oil, gave a curdled, oil spill look to it. I tried it. Cod liver oil in anything is revoltingly healthy.
Rick once stripped 3 inch strips from a nearby poplar tree. It laid overnight in a tent with red cloth in it. They sold great to the neighbor kids after Rick renamed them "cherry colored flavored chew sticks." Rick's been a wordsmith for 35+ years.
On Wednesday, June 11, 2008, Texas inmate Karl Chamberlain was executed. For his last meal he requested and received: 1 fresh fruit tray containing orange slices, apples, watermelon, cantelope, peaches, plums, grapes, and strawberries, 1 vegetable tray including carrot sticks, celery, two tomatoes, lettuce, cucumbers, olives, and sweet pickles, a cheese tray with various lunchmeats, cheeses, a bowl of ranch dressing, twelve deviled eggs, six jalapenos stuffed with cheese, one chef salad with ranch dressing, one large plate of onion rings with ketchup and hot sauce, one pound of french fries smothered with shredded cheddar cheeses and salsa, two bacon double cheeseburgers smothered with grilled onions, three batter-fried chicken breasts, one bean and cheese quesadilla, salsa and jalapenos on the side, side orders of sour cream and guacamole, one three-egg omelet with grilled onions, mushrooms, ham, and lots of cheese, two barbecue pork rolls, one pitcher of orange juice, and one pitcher of milk.
Chitlins. Southern redneck hicks eat these cooked pig intestines, which probably started when they realized they had to eat every part of the pig because they were too dirt poor to buy meat. Shortly after that, the pig ears ox tails, and pigs knuckles followed. Then the giblets and chicken feet. Some of those guys will eat anything.
To whoever submitted the archaic California laws referred to in previous posts - evry state has some weird ones, but in Iowa they tend to be somewhat puritanical. For instance, in Iowa it is against the law for a kiss to last longer than five minutes.
To anon. above about the chitlins. Here in ATL, every Publix, Kroger, Whole Foods, Ingles, etc. have large areas in their meat section devoted entirely to all of the items you mentioned plus others you haven't thought existed. Being a northern transplant, I have never tried any of these, nor do I intend to. It is known as "soul food". No kidding. Only the blacks buy it. The southern redneck hicks cook bbq in a smoker and talk about trucks and four wheelers or hang out at Hooters, judging "flats", or "cups" on the waitresses' asses. I can't make this kind of stuff up. Also - "storm of the century" on ATL news channels today. 2 to 4 inches of snow forecast for the Macon area. Schools in ATL already closing. Buy milk and bread.
After you dig yourself out, maybe you'll want to amble on over to the closest southern cafe and get a big pile of fried green tomatoes. A great dish for the southerners who just can't wait for their tomatoes to ripen. Then they just throw'em in a skillet. Yum yum. Maybe you'll top that off with a couple pickled pigs feet. No description needed.
Far and away, the most disgusting thing I have heard of humans eating would have to be human placentas, which can be ordered in many places in Southeast Asia. They are thought to be a fertility-booster. Go figure.
One time at a Jefferson restaurant that no longer exists, my wife was brought a bowl of soup with a really long, black hair in it. When I complained, the waitress took it back into the back room and reemerged just a couple seconds later with what looked to me like the same bowl - minus the offending hair. No offer of getting it free, either. To this day, I'm convinced that she just reserved me the same bowl.
Next time you're in Hy-vee or a health food store, head over to the aisle that features fake candy and cookies, etc. for people who lead a "healthy" lifestyle. They've come up with all kinds of imitation chocolate, sugar, and things that normally are good to eat. Too bad that they all taste like shit when you replace their ingredients with healthy substitutes.
I'll go you one better. Just go to any nearby Golden Corral or buffet-style reastaurant and watch all those disgusting, overweight people pig out on rolls, gravy, and ice cream. Some time in the health food aisle wouldn't hurt them a bit.
When vegetarian friends of mine visit Iowa, we spend little time in Jefferson. Imagine trying to find a place to eat if you're a vegetarian. When we mentioned this to some locals, they said that lots of places served salad. What kind of answer is that?
Think about it. How big a demand do you suppose there would be for a vegetarian dish at a restaurant in Jefferson? Nobody would order it. Ever. And I mean nobody. Local restaurants would be happy to serve your vegetarian friend, but it would make absolutely no sense for them to keep that crap on the menu year-round.
On one hand, if you are a vegetarian that is your problem. On the other hand, serving vegetarians at a restaurant is easy. They can order your regular fare and eat around the meat. Screw these self righteous self centered hacks. I don't go to a salad bar and demand prime rib. These people have made a conscious choice to eat in a different manner than the rest of us so they have to make a conscious effort to accomplish that. The rest of us don't. Screw them.
I agree with Big Nasty. Restaurant fare is all about supply and demand, just like everything else. The reason you can't get a vegetarian dish in Jefferson is because nobody around there wants one.
To put it in another way, would you take a vacation to Kenya and spend the whole time bitching about their lack of Big Macs? If I decided tomorrow I wasn't going to eat any meals over 200 calories, that's fine. But I can't expect restaurants to have a bunch of meals like that available.
My suggestion is that those guys start eating normally.
32 comments:
In the early 80's, I had dog chili in a town south of Jefferson - Brownsville, Texas. I did not know what it was till afterwords. It tasted like chili. It was good. I would not have tried it if I had known beforehand. This is what food is all about, though. When you find good food you roll with it, kind of like when that girl you just met grabs your head and shoves your face into her boobs.
In Mexico City, you can order cabeza de cabrito, which is goat's head. It is served on a plate, with the head split open, allowing you to eat the brains directly out of the skull. The tongue is hanging out of the mouth, and you can ask the waiter to thinly slice it for you. I passed on that one.
Salade verte au tripe. The green salad was fine, but I had a hard time with the tripe even though it was cooked with butter and lots of garlic. I did manage to eat most of it. I was smart enough never to order it again. I'm going to brush my teeth again just to get the memory of tripe out of my mouth.
Tripe is stomach from cows (in my case) or from other livestock like pigs, sheep, goats, etc.
I remember as a kid going into Bordenaro's and finding really strange canned goods on their shelves. I once located a can of tiger meat and showed it to Tom Bordenaro. He looked at it, then peeled off the label. Stamped directly on the can it said, "Genuine Rattlesnake Meat".
Back in the 70's, Bordenaro's also carried chocolate-covered ants. We used to take them to the Cooper school and eat them during class. They were mostly chocolate, so you barely noticed the ants. Then one day some kid brought chocolate-coated grasshoppers to school. The bug was a lot more noticeable in those.
Anybody else out there ever try haggis? This is a traditional meal in Scotland and consists basically of a sheep's stomach stuffed with oatmeal. Absolutely the worst-tasting thing I ever ate (or tried to).
Without question the worst Thanksgiving meal I was ever served was at an ex-girlfriend's parents house, where we feasted on a real treat called tofurkey. The manufacturer had attempted to season it, I guess, but to me it tasted the way I would imagine more suited to the box it came in.
In California, believe it or not, it is against the law to eat an orange in your bathtub.
That's nothing ... I just found where in L.A. it is legal for a man to beat his wife with a leather strap, as long as it is 2" wide or less. To use a wider one, he is required to get her permission.
I remember a time many years ago when Diamond Dave and myself mixed up a concoction of cod liver oil, pickle juice, and sour milk and talked a neighbor girl into drinking it. We really enjoyed her reaction.
You can buy a bowl of birds nest soup in China for $50-$100 a bowl. These are not made out of twigs and stuff, either. Swifts' nests are made basically out of bird spit, so it is quite the delicacy.
In my estimation, nothing beats a well prepared bird spit casserole. If you are curious as where to order this exotic dish, go to any restaurant and piss off the waiter or the cook.
On the drink concoction per Rick B.
Some tabasco was in it also. I thought the milk was good, but mixed with the cod liver oil, gave a curdled, oil spill look to it. I tried it. Cod liver oil in anything is revoltingly healthy.
Rick once stripped 3 inch strips from a nearby poplar tree. It laid overnight in a tent with red cloth in it. They sold great to the neighbor kids after Rick renamed them "cherry colored flavored chew sticks." Rick's been a wordsmith for 35+ years.
On Wednesday, June 11, 2008, Texas inmate Karl Chamberlain was executed. For his last meal he requested and received: 1 fresh fruit tray containing orange slices, apples, watermelon, cantelope, peaches, plums, grapes, and strawberries, 1 vegetable tray including carrot sticks, celery, two tomatoes, lettuce, cucumbers, olives, and sweet pickles, a cheese tray with various lunchmeats, cheeses, a bowl of ranch dressing, twelve deviled eggs, six jalapenos stuffed with cheese, one chef salad with ranch dressing, one large plate of onion rings with ketchup and hot sauce, one pound of french fries smothered with shredded cheddar cheeses and salsa, two bacon double cheeseburgers smothered with grilled onions, three batter-fried chicken breasts, one bean and cheese quesadilla, salsa and jalapenos on the side, side orders of sour cream and guacamole, one three-egg omelet with grilled onions, mushrooms, ham, and lots of cheese, two barbecue pork rolls, one pitcher of orange juice, and one pitcher of milk.
Chitlins. Southern redneck hicks eat these cooked pig intestines, which probably started when they realized they had to eat every part of the pig because they were too dirt poor to buy meat. Shortly after that, the pig ears ox tails, and pigs knuckles followed. Then the giblets and chicken feet. Some of those guys will eat anything.
To whoever submitted the archaic California laws referred to in previous posts - evry state has some weird ones, but in Iowa they tend to be somewhat puritanical. For instance, in Iowa it is against the law for a kiss to last longer than five minutes.
To anon. above about the chitlins. Here in ATL, every Publix, Kroger, Whole Foods, Ingles, etc. have large areas in their meat section devoted entirely to all of the items you mentioned plus others you haven't thought existed. Being a northern transplant, I have never tried any of these, nor do I intend to. It is known as "soul food". No kidding. Only the blacks buy it. The southern redneck hicks cook bbq in a smoker and talk about trucks and four wheelers or hang out at Hooters, judging "flats", or "cups" on the waitresses' asses. I can't make this kind of stuff up. Also - "storm of the century" on ATL news channels today. 2 to 4 inches of snow forecast for the Macon area. Schools in ATL already closing. Buy milk and bread.
Marty -
After you dig yourself out, maybe you'll want to amble on over to the closest southern cafe and get a big pile of fried green tomatoes. A great dish for the southerners who just can't wait for their tomatoes to ripen. Then they just throw'em in a skillet. Yum yum. Maybe you'll top that off with a couple pickled pigs feet. No description needed.
Far and away, the most disgusting thing I have heard of humans eating would have to be human placentas, which can be ordered in many places in Southeast Asia. They are thought to be a fertility-booster. Go figure.
One time at a Jefferson restaurant that no longer exists, my wife was brought a bowl of soup with a really long, black hair in it. When I complained, the waitress took it back into the back room and reemerged just a couple seconds later with what looked to me like the same bowl - minus the offending hair. No offer of getting it free, either. To this day, I'm convinced that she just reserved me the same bowl.
I goota say, eating placentas is basically cannibalism. That is probably a whole different thread.
Next time you're in Hy-vee or a health food store, head over to the aisle that features fake candy and cookies, etc. for people who lead a "healthy" lifestyle. They've come up with all kinds of imitation chocolate, sugar, and things that normally are good to eat. Too bad that they all taste like shit when you replace their ingredients with healthy substitutes.
I'll go you one better. Just go to any nearby Golden Corral or buffet-style reastaurant and watch all those disgusting, overweight people pig out on rolls, gravy, and ice cream. Some time in the health food aisle wouldn't hurt them a bit.
Had any hash brownies lately? I remember eating a batch back in '79 and not remembering anything for 24 hours.
Stonehead your brain is hash my guess is you don't have a job. Have you tried getting yours sorry self into some rehab? Its never too late.
Try eating a turducken some day. A chicken, stuffed in a duck, then stuffed in a turkey. This is a vegan's nightmare.
Rehab is not the issue. I can do that, no problem. In fact I've done it many times. So you see, rehab is not the issue at all.
My vote for the most inedible yet frequently eaten food in the state of Iowa today: The Quik Trip hot gog.
When vegetarian friends of mine visit Iowa, we spend little time in Jefferson. Imagine trying to find a place to eat if you're a vegetarian. When we mentioned this to some locals, they said that lots of places served salad. What kind of answer is that?
Think about it. How big a demand do you suppose there would be for a vegetarian dish at a restaurant in Jefferson? Nobody would order it. Ever. And I mean nobody. Local restaurants would be happy to serve your vegetarian friend, but it would make absolutely no sense for them to keep that crap on the menu year-round.
On one hand, if you are a vegetarian that is your problem. On the other hand, serving vegetarians at a restaurant is easy. They can order your regular fare and eat around the meat. Screw these self righteous self centered hacks. I don't go to a salad bar and demand prime rib. These people have made a conscious choice to eat in a different manner than the rest of us so they have to make a conscious effort to accomplish that. The rest of us don't. Screw them.
I agree with Big Nasty. Restaurant fare is all about supply and demand, just like everything else. The reason you can't get a vegetarian dish in Jefferson is because nobody around there wants one.
To put it in another way, would you take a vacation to Kenya and spend the whole time bitching about their lack of Big Macs? If I decided tomorrow I wasn't going to eat any meals over 200 calories, that's fine. But I can't expect restaurants to have a bunch of meals like that available.
My suggestion is that those guys start eating normally.
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